Sam Gomez - GreenEggsAndSam.com

Can you ask Santa for a job?
Can elves make those?
They can’t take up much room on the sleigh, can they?
Santa, if you are really watching, I’ve been very good this year. And no matter what Robin and Linda say, I didn’t come up with #8 on the “Confusing Claus” list.

Please welcome our newest family member, Nicole. Nicole is obsessed with John Mayer and likes music, knitting and reading. She also taught me how to dance the Bachata.

The cute little boy in my holiday card is me. (Thus a 1977 lil Sammy.) No need for alarm. There’s no Sammy Jr at this time.

Ok, I didn’t write these, but a few of them did make me chuckle.
The top 18 ways to confuse Santa Claus
1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.
2. While he’s in the house, go find his sleigh and [...]

The other day I realized that one of my favorite childhood schoolbus holiday songs, may no longer be slightly irreverant, but rather flat out not PC.
(Sang to the tune of “Deck the Halls”)
Deck the school halls with gasoline,
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.
Strike a match and watch it gleam,
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.
Watch the schoolhouse burn to ashes,
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.
Aren’t [...]

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” Until this year, I don’t think I ever really understood what that meant. Over the past year I’ve had the chance to go, see and do things I never thought imaginable. I’ve made some really great new friends and I’ve had time to [...]

Wednesday I was scheduled to present an oral overview of my business plan. I wasn’t very worked up about the presentation because by that point I’d already shared the pitch with at least 40+ music business-type folk. In a nutshell, the proposal is an independent record company’s approach to marketing and digital distribution of [...]

Wednesday I was scheduled to present an oral overview of my business plan. I wasn’t very worked up about the presentation because by that point I’d already shared the pitch with at least 40+ music business-type folk. In a nutshell, the proposal is an independent record company’s approach to marketing and digital distribution of [...]

Note to self: Take baby-sitting job, buy cat, and let cat do my homework. This darn cat has a higher GPA than me! Bastard!

During my next interview, instead of discussing my abilities and accomplishments, I just want to make up obnoxious (and obviously false) assertions. For example, I want to say that I invented the color green or how my farts smell like freshly cut flowers.
I wonder if it will make a difference.